This I Promise You
by BlackMagick
Summary: A one shot in Jesse's POV. He's watching Suze and thinking obviously about her. And him. Etc...


A/N: Okay, this is just another song fic. one shot, because I have no ideas for stories, but I'm thinking about writing a P/S one, but that'll be later.

Anyway, this is set sometime in Haunted, definitely after Darkest Hour, and before the end of Haunted so…yah.

Disclaimer: I own none of the Meg Cabot's characters…blah blah blah more endless talking and the song, bye Nsync, I don't own that either. A bunch of other people do, apparently.

Koizak

p.s. This is in Jesse's POV. But you'd probably have figured that out anyway.

This I Promise You

I watched her. She didn't know I was there. But I was, I had been, ever since she had come here. How long had it been? I didn't know exactly. When you've been dead as long as I have, time blurs together. Days, weeks, months, years…it just happens.

And then she came.

And my world seemed to become clear again. When I was with her, I felt alive. Like I could breathe, laugh, talk….love.

_Susannah…._

I watched the tears fall from her eyes. I didn't know why she was so upset. Why was she crying? I would have given a lot to have taken her into my arms and make her tears stop.

But I couldn't.

_When the visions around you_

_Bring tears to your eyes_

_And all that surround you_

_Are secrets and lies_

It hit me, like someone had thrown it at me, that I didn't have anything to give. Nothing. I could give her nothing. Was it best to just…leave?

Or would that make everything worse? I didn't see how that would be possible…but I suppose…

Or was it just running away? She liked me as a friend…she did not love me.

That hurt most of all.

When I thought of that, that she didn't love me, it felt like someone had gorged a hole in my chest. It was a mental pain, but I swear, it hurt so much I could feel it.

I wished again that I could comfort her. But I wouldn't.

I would stay in the background. And maybe…fade away.

_Slater._

I hated him because he was alive. And because he was alive, he was able to have something I wanted so desperately.

Susannah. She was my world. She was everything that I had dreamed of, hoped for.

And here she was, crying, in a heap on her bed in front of me. Yet I did nothing. I watched her, invisible from my place on her window seat. Waiting…for what? I didn't know.

_I'll be your strength _

_I'll give you hope_

_Keeping your faith when it's gone_

_The one you should call_

_Was standing here all along_

Would he comfort her? Would she run to him? Because she thought I wasn't here? Would I loose my chance?

What chance?

I was _dead._

I was also, apparently, in denial of that little fact.

I wished she knew how much I loved her. That she didn't have to run to him. I watched her wipe more tears from her face. Susannah, mi querida, don't you know? I'm here. I've always been here. And I always will be, so long as you wish it. But what if she didn't want me here?

_And I will take you in my arms_

_And hold you right where you belong_

_Till the day my life is through_

_This I promise you_

I would always gladly welcome her into my arms. With love. Because, I loved her. I didn't realize it for a long time. But it was true.

I loved her.

I would protect her so long as I was there to do so. Because as much as she thought she could do things herself, she couldn't sometimes. Not that she didn't try. But I wouldn't let her risk her life. She had too much to live for.

I had nothing to fear.

_I've loved you forever_

_In lifetimes before_

_And I promise you never_

_Will you hurt anymore_

I was lost in thought and I guess I lost my concentration, because I heard a, "Jesse?" from my right.

I turned my head and saw her, looking up at me, the tears shining in her eyes.

"Susannah, I am sorry. I'll go."

I started to dematerialize, embarrassed at being caught.

"No, stay."

Her voice was barely above a whisper. But I heard it, and I obliged.

"But tell me, why? Why did you do it? Was it a test that I failed? Curiosity? What made you do it?"

Nombre de Dios, what was she talking about? I honestly had no idea.

I gently sat next to her on the bed and took her small hand in mine. I stroked it with one thumb, felt the usual jumpy reaction of my nerves from being this close to her. I fought to remain still.

"What did you fail querida?"

_I give you my word_

_I give you my heart_

_This is a battle we've won_

_And with this vow_

_Forever has now begun_

"That kiss…" she pulled her hand away, wiped away another tear.

I froze.

She was crying over….me?

I ran a hand through my hair; she was worried, that I didn't like her? Didn't love her?

She couldn't have been more wrong.

"Susannah, look at me," I gently tipped her face up to mine, looked at her beautiful tear stained face, "Te quiero, Susannah."

She blinked back at me, like she had no idea what I was talking abou—

Oops.

"I love you, Susannah."

She just kind of stared at me. What if I was wrong? What if she didn't love me?

What if I'd given her my heart, just to have her stomp on it with those shoes she seemed to like so much?

And then she smiled. A true smile, not a sympathetic smile, but an actual smile.

She moved closer to me.

"Really?" She looked in my eyes, her emerald ones seemed to captivate me, like I was falling into a deep green pool.

"Yes."

"I love you too Jesse."  
Even if I had known it, it still seemed like a shock to me. To hear her say it. And maybe it couldn't work out. Maybe she would eventually find someone else. And I would move on.

But for _now_? _This_ moment?

We had forever.

_Just close your eyes_

_Each lovin' day_

_And know this feeling won't go away_

'_Till the day my life is through_

_This I promise you _

I felt a smile spread across my face and I reached up to wipe away the tears.

The tears that had stopped falling.

I pulled her into my arms. She was so close, and for now, she was mine.

I kissed her gently.

I knew then, from the moment that our lips touched that I would love her forever. I just…knew. And we would find some way to make it work. Something would happen. But that was for later. This was for now.

_Over and over I fall_

_When I hear you call_

_Without you in my life, baby_

_I just wouldn't be living at all_

She pulled back and I blushed. Had I moved too fast? Sometimes it was hard, not to just pull her into my arms and kiss her. And that was before I knew she loved me.

But she just shifted her position and pulled my head down again.

_And I will take you in my arms_

_And hold you right where you belong_

'_Till the day my life is through_

_This I promise you_

Finally, I pulled away.

"I'll love you forever querida."

"Promise?"

There was so much in that one question.

And only one answer.

"I promise."

A/N: I know, we can all say it together: CHEESE! But, cute cheese, if I do say so myself. I was feeling very sappy, so vwala (however that's spelled). Review please!


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